Give Me
The Gun
A man and woman are sitting on a
couch. They make pleasant, boring
conversation until a man runs on stage holding a gun.
Man: What the f-
Gunman: Get down on the ground! Get down on the ground!
Man and Woman, visibly shaken up, get down on their knees.
Gunman (waving his gun at
the couple): Alright! Just
listen to me and no one gets hurt! Okay! Nobody's gonna get hurt if
you just give me the gun!
A short silence.
Man: But -
Gunman: Just give me the gun! Hand over the gun and nobody's gonna
get hurt!
Woman: But -
Gunman: It's not that hard, people!
Just give me the gun and
everybody's gonna be okay!
The man and woman look at each other.
Man: But...you have the
gun. We don't have any gun.
Gunman (getting crazier):
Just shut up! Everybody shut up and listen to me! All you have to do
is hand over the gun and nobody gets hurt. Everything is gonna be
okay if you just do what I say!
Another period of silence. The gunman keeps shakily pointing the
gun at the couple.
Gunman (yelling crazily):
I said just hand over the gun!
Woman: Honey, just give him the gun!
Man (shocked):
What the hell are you talking about? I -
Gunman: JUST GIVE ME THE -
The gun goes off, still pointing at the couple, but the gunman
falls over dead. The couple look at each other.
END
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